Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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