Sry I called you an 8
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize