we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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