I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
