The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
