it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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