Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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