yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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