Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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