ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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