oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
When I unzipped my pants I said "Release the Cracken"... she dug it so we're getting married soon.
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize