last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize