his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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