well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
