i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
