At least make sure they are 18
Why
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
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