I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
We need to rekindle our bromance
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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