I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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