i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
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