She said her name was "party"
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Randomize
