You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
