as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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