dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
