We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize
