my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
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