You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
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