She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
