I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
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