While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
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Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
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This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
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