You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Randomize