that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.