Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
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