you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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