I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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