I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I looked at my own cervix.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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