Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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