One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize