By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
I FOUND THE LEGS
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
