just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
