she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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