Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
