i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
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