they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
We left the knife in your bed.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
