i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Randomize
