when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
