True but thats because hes a fetus.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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