I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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