I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize