Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Two words: blizzard sex
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
