hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
Roman Polanski is more welcome at my daughter's birthday party than you are at that bar
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Randomize
