Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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